Abigail, also known as Abby, liked to spend her evening nights on the balcony in her parents bedroom upstairs. It was a safe spot for her. A special, peaceful, alone place where she could not only be herself, but take time away from her family. Things were hectic between the Summers. And worst of all, she didn't know what to do about it.
Thankfully, Abby was to spend the entire month of July in New York with her friend, Angie. A month away from the arguing, yelling, and constant screaming, was a dream come true. Although it was quite clear that Emma and Abby had a difficult relationship, Abby couldn't help but think that there was still a chance at saving it before it was too late. Emma would say differently, of course. She wanted no part in Abby, and frankly, Abby couldn't blame her.
Abby was perfect, after all. Perfect grades, perfect friends, perfect job, perfect boyfriend. And yet, Abby wasn't happy inside. Sure, on the outside, Abby was a great actress. She could hide her feelings in the blink of an eye, and didn't have a problem keeping them to herself and not worrying about them.
It was starting to get to her though.
She didn't know if she could put up with Emma and her crazy behavior anymore. Always, Emma had done ruthless acts against her, but Abby put up with it. Making excuses and saying Emma just wasn't over the leave of their father yet. It's five years later now and Emma's twelve, going on thirteen soon. She couldn't possibly still be hurting. That's bull crap.
She was only six when their dad had left the family. Sure, it had been on Emma's birthday, but it's not like she exactly remembered every detail about it. Until this day, she doesn't know every detail about it. She does what every thirteen year old teenager does; she assumes she knows everything about the situation, and Abby had to restrain herself from blowing up at Emma whenever this happened.
It was at this moment when Emma opened the slider door and stepped out onto the balcony. She stared at Abby oddly before finally speaking. But when she did, it was barely a whisper.
“Look, don't take it the wrong way, but... I'm sorry,” Emma muttered slightly.
Abby held back her smile as she said, “'Bout what?”
“You know what. Don't act all dumb. You're not the blonde one here,” Emma replied.
“I think you should tell me what you are sorry for though.”
“That's what you think. Doesn't mean that's going to happen.” Emma chuckles now, while taking a seat near Abby.
“How long is this going to have to go on for?” Abby asks, curiously.
“Hmmm?”
“Oh c'mon! Just because you are the blonde one doesn't mean you need to act the part. How long are we going to have to do this?”
“Honestly, I don't know. However long it lasts, I guess.”
“You want to continue to argue and treat each other like this? What are sisters for, if we can't at least get along for an hour? I did what you wanted, by not taking you to that damn therapist that Mom and Dad want you to go to every week. Instead, I take you to the stupid park so you can try to act cool with your friends and pretend to be drunk for the passerby’s that see you,” Abby got up and walked to the edge of the balcony - overlooking the view of the downtown city metropolitan area.
“But news flash, you're not cool. You're wasting your time and precious money on pathetic, pointless, things. You don't understand that now, and that's fine, you're still young. But one day, you'll regret the decisions you're making now, and the ones you've made in the past. I know you will,” When she finished, she turned around to face Emma once again. “Why won't you just try to listen to me?”
“Because, I don't want to be recognized by being like you! I want to be recognized for me. But that can't happen when you're around!” Emma admitted.
“And so the truth comes out...”
“Shut up! It's not like that,” Emma mumbled.
“Oh? What's it like then?” Abby pushed, trying to get more information out.
"I don't think you'd understand."
"Why not?"
"Because your life is so.. I don't know, easy," Emma admits.
"So you think." Abby turns her head slightly and gazes up at the stars. Just now realizing its the full moon she's waited 29 days to see. She smiles to herself and says, "You honestly have no idea."
Emma snorts unattractively, "What don't I know about Miss Perfect's life?"
Abby jerks around and says, "See! That's exactly what I mean! You think I live this 'Miss Perfect' life, but I don't!"
Emma looks taken back as she says, "What can be so bad in your life?"
Abby looks exasperated. "Oh, you mean besides the fact that my boyfriend is pressuring me into sex! And that I almost failed my geometry test, so I had to cover it up from Mom and Dad! They think I'm their perfect little girl, so I have to live up to their expectations! At least, you can slack off and not get paraded about it!"
"That's not true! I get paraded about it every freakin' day! 'Why can't you be more like your sister?' or 'You should really look up to Abby, she's a wondeful influence.' You think I like hearing about your grand achievements? It gets real old after awhile. 'Abby this, and Abby that.' At least you aren't looked down upon!"
"I don't know what to say..." Abby lets her thoughts trail off.
"There's nothing to say. This can't be fixed. Our family cannot be fixed. One way or another, our family is shit."
"Watch your language, you're only thirteen, missy."
"I was in the moment," Emma laughs more to herself than to Abby.
Abby sighs absentmindedly, and Emma continues, "What do we do now?"
"Well, I don't want to keep arguing like this... we're basically ruining our relationhship."
"Basically," Emma agrees.
"So what do you wanna do about it?" Abby asks.
"Forgive and forget?"
"I guess that could work.. for now."
"Okay... truce?" Emma stuck her hand in Abby's face, and Abby couldn't help but smile and return the handshake. "Truce," she agreed.
For now, things were okay. For now. But who knew? Maybe things would get better. Maybe life would give them another chance to start over again.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Monday, November 1, 2010
As you can tell... I love my kitty(:
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| Summertime in her tent(: |
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| She's always getting into things! |
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| I'm pretty sure she's in love with her post. |
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| Just being silly! |
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| In my Sink ?! |
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Something Like No Other
Love is patient.
Love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves.
Love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves.
Friday, October 8, 2010
Monday, October 4, 2010
Chapter One ~ Draft One
It was a Sunday afternoon, and the temperature outside was an uncomfortable 105 degrees Fahrenheit. Not an uncommon thing in the season of Mid-July in Henderson. As soon as August rolled around, it was only said to become hotter. Something that Sandy, a mother of two, previously divorced, but re-married, liked to ignore as she watched the daily news that afternoon. Another thing she liked to ignore, besides the blazing heat, was her youngest daughter's constant slipping grades.
Sandy had thought this to herself a couple hours ago, when she had been previously nibbling on a piece of toast, sipping her nicely hot cup of White Chocolate Mocha, and glancing over her daughter's last report card of the year. Four B's and one C plus.
“I don't remember getting grades like these, back when I was in Middle School,” Sandy mumbled to herself while slurping another sip of coffee. These grades were unacceptable, but Sandy knew not to come down harsh on Emma, for she would blame it Abigail, Sandy's oldest daughter. How Emma always found a way to blame everything on Abigail, still amazed Sandy.
Of course, Sandy knew that Emma felt she had to do everything perfect in order to live up to her older sister. Abigail was a straight A student since 2nd grade. While accomplishing that, she also managed to keep a social life, a nice paying job, and a steady relationship with her long time boyfriend, Jeff. Sandy couldn't help but admit she was proud of Abigail. Emma on the other hand, was a handful. Distant from the rest of the family.
It hadn't always been like this, of course. We had all been one happy family, but Adam had to go and ruin that, Sandy thought to herself. Adam was Sandy's ex-husband, and the father of Abigail and Emma, although he never acted the part. Not since Emma's sixth birthday, anyway.
The story she often liked to forget, haunted her dreams nightly. Sandy couldn't help but think that even though both girls seemed to have forgot what had happened, they were still hurting inside. That's what frightened her the most. The thought that two young girls were forced to heal their wounds on their own. And children of that age aren't supposed to go through things like that. It could possibly ruin their chances of having a normal childhood. Which was all that Sandy wanted for her two children. She wanted them to be happy.
Which was partly why Sandy was so extremely grateful that her ex-husband, Adam, had decided never to play a part in the girls lives since so many years ago. And even then, he never was a very good father... or husband, for that matter.
Exactly six years ago, at Emma's birthday party, Adam had announced his leave of the family. Adam had always been unexceptionally good looking, so Sandy had assumed the many rumors that flowed through the town were true. Adam had a way with words, and therefore a way with many women who were not looking for a real relationship, but rather a hook up.
One thing about Adam, was that his family was extremely wealthy. Own there own jet and runway, kind of wealthy. And even after the divorce, and when Sandy had decided not to let Adam have visitation rights, Adam did absolutely nothing to gain them back. Even with all his money to hire a lawyer, he didn't even try. Sandy came to the conclusion that Adam didn't want anything to do with his old family. Which was exactly true.
“Sandy, sweetheart, what are your plans for the day?” Christopher Summers, age forty-five, but didn't look a day of forty, was Sandy's current husband and the girls step-father. He swung his arms around Sandy's waist and rested his head lightly on her shoulder.
“Nothing interesting,” she shrugged. “I'll probably do some cleaning around the house while you and the girls are gone,” Sandy said casually.
“Sounds like you'll have a full packed day. This house is a mess,” Chris chuckled sarcastically.
“Oh really, well maybe you should stay home and clean and I'// go to work instead.” Sandy turned her head effortlessly and kissed Chris.
Between kisses, Chris said, “If we keep doing this, I won't want to go to work.”
“But on the contrary, you must.”
“And why is that?”
“Because, you make the big bucks.”
“Is that all I'm good for?” Chris responded, sweetly.
“That among other things.” Sandy replied, pushing Chris out the front door, coffee and paper in hand, only stopping to kiss him again before shutting the door.
Now, a couple of hours later in the day, Sandy had ditched her cup of coffee for an iced water, and was laying out by the pool. No way was she going to waste her day cleaning the house. And reasonably, the house wasn't that much of a mess. Maybe the bathrooms needed cleaning or the dishes needed done, but she'd make the girls do that when they came home from the therapist. Those were regular chores the girl's needed to do anyway. Especially Emma.
Maybe Sandy would make Emma do both the bathrooms and the dishes as punishment for her bad grades, and then tell Abigail she didn't have to do anything as a reward for her amazing grades. No, Sandy thought to herself. That would cause an argument from Emma. She'd say I was playing favorites.
What a pain, Emma was sometimes. Sure, it was one thing to argue with your siblings and parents on occasion, but it was an entire different thing to turn hostile on them. Sandy and Chris couldn't even reward Abigail for her magnificent behavior and amazing grades, for fear that if they didn't show Emma the same attitude as they showed Abigail, things would get ugly. But all Emma had to do was act a tiny bit more like her sister. Not arguing with everything Sandy and Chris said. Not opposing the authoritative figure at school. Not flunking out of classes. Not trying to sneak out. Not getting bad grades. The list was an endless black hole.
“Mom! We're home!” Interrupting her thoughts, Sandy heard Abigail yell from the front door. She then heard some clanking and smacking, then thudding all the way up the stairs, and finally a slam of the door.
Pretending not to notice the entrance Emma made, Sandy replied, “I'm out back!”
Several minutes passed before Sandy heard flip flops step lightly on the patio and then a figure appear beside her. Dressed in her sailor blue and white bikini swimsuit, Abigail looked extremely annoyed. It wasn't normally that Abigail presented herself as annoyed, so Sandy new right away that something was wrong.
“What's wrong?” Sandy asked.
“Don't pretend you didn't hear that,” Abigail challenged. “She's a mess. That stupid, know-it-all Philologist, didn't do crap for her. It only pissed her off even more. Obviously, whatever she's going through is not something that someone else is going to fix for her.”
“You don't know that. For all we know, she could be suffering inside, and we're not trying hard enough to make her at peace,” Sandy said.
“At peace? You think she wants to be at peace?”
“Yes, I do,” Sandy replied, simply.
“That girl threw a baseball through my car window today! I have to pay for that now. Will she offer to pay for it? No, she won't. She doesn't care what I think of her! She hates me! Why she hates me? I have no idea, and I'm starting to not care.”
“Okay, Abigail, please calm down. Why did she throw a baseball through your car window?”
“Oh, that's the worst part, she was aiming at me! I ducked in time, and it went straight through the window of my car, instead,” Abigail complained.
“She tried to hit you with a baseball?”
“Yes.”
“But you ducked?”
“Yes.”
“So it, instead, went through the window of your car?”
“Yes.”
“Causing the window to shatter, I presume?”
“Yes.”
“And you reacted by...?”
“I screamed at her for several minutes, but she just stood there and glared at me. Not a word I said made an influence on her, whatsoever. So I made her walk the first three miles home, and then I picked her up and we drove the rest of the way," Abigail stated, like it was no big deal at all.
“You what?”
“I made her walk the last three miles home. It's not like it's that big of deal. It's not raining or thunder storming or anything like that. Just heat, and walking three miles in the heat, isn't going to kill her. Probably do her some good.”
“Okay well did you ask her why she tried to hit you with a baseball?”
“Of course I did. After we got back in the car, I asked her, and she said that 'life would be so much easier if you'd just go away.'” Abigail said, obviously aggravated.
“So she actually tried to harm you?” Sandy was still trying to understand the concept.
“YES mother! She actually tried to harm me! And I'm not going to put up with her doing things like this and not getting a punishment!” Abigail turned around and walked to the edge of the pool, then swan dived in. Resurfacing, she suggested, “You should go talk to her.”
Sandy nodded in agreement, stood up and then walked inside the house, only to hear the music blasting from Emma's room. At this same moment, Chris stepped into the house from the garage door, and frowned at Emma's obtrusive music.
“I'll handle it,” Sandy muttered as she passed Chris on her way up the stairs. This game that Emma liked to play was really starting to get old.
Okay, here's Chapter One... I hope you enjoy it! Remember that I haven't done a single thing of editing yet... so of course there is going to be errors and things that just plainly don't make sense. Let's make the best of it... kay?!
-Alyssa <3
Sandy had thought this to herself a couple hours ago, when she had been previously nibbling on a piece of toast, sipping her nicely hot cup of White Chocolate Mocha, and glancing over her daughter's last report card of the year. Four B's and one C plus.
“I don't remember getting grades like these, back when I was in Middle School,” Sandy mumbled to herself while slurping another sip of coffee. These grades were unacceptable, but Sandy knew not to come down harsh on Emma, for she would blame it Abigail, Sandy's oldest daughter. How Emma always found a way to blame everything on Abigail, still amazed Sandy.
Of course, Sandy knew that Emma felt she had to do everything perfect in order to live up to her older sister. Abigail was a straight A student since 2nd grade. While accomplishing that, she also managed to keep a social life, a nice paying job, and a steady relationship with her long time boyfriend, Jeff. Sandy couldn't help but admit she was proud of Abigail. Emma on the other hand, was a handful. Distant from the rest of the family.
It hadn't always been like this, of course. We had all been one happy family, but Adam had to go and ruin that, Sandy thought to herself. Adam was Sandy's ex-husband, and the father of Abigail and Emma, although he never acted the part. Not since Emma's sixth birthday, anyway.
The story she often liked to forget, haunted her dreams nightly. Sandy couldn't help but think that even though both girls seemed to have forgot what had happened, they were still hurting inside. That's what frightened her the most. The thought that two young girls were forced to heal their wounds on their own. And children of that age aren't supposed to go through things like that. It could possibly ruin their chances of having a normal childhood. Which was all that Sandy wanted for her two children. She wanted them to be happy.
Which was partly why Sandy was so extremely grateful that her ex-husband, Adam, had decided never to play a part in the girls lives since so many years ago. And even then, he never was a very good father... or husband, for that matter.
Exactly six years ago, at Emma's birthday party, Adam had announced his leave of the family. Adam had always been unexceptionally good looking, so Sandy had assumed the many rumors that flowed through the town were true. Adam had a way with words, and therefore a way with many women who were not looking for a real relationship, but rather a hook up.
One thing about Adam, was that his family was extremely wealthy. Own there own jet and runway, kind of wealthy. And even after the divorce, and when Sandy had decided not to let Adam have visitation rights, Adam did absolutely nothing to gain them back. Even with all his money to hire a lawyer, he didn't even try. Sandy came to the conclusion that Adam didn't want anything to do with his old family. Which was exactly true.
“Sandy, sweetheart, what are your plans for the day?” Christopher Summers, age forty-five, but didn't look a day of forty, was Sandy's current husband and the girls step-father. He swung his arms around Sandy's waist and rested his head lightly on her shoulder.
“Nothing interesting,” she shrugged. “I'll probably do some cleaning around the house while you and the girls are gone,” Sandy said casually.
“Sounds like you'll have a full packed day. This house is a mess,” Chris chuckled sarcastically.
“Oh really, well maybe you should stay home and clean and I'// go to work instead.” Sandy turned her head effortlessly and kissed Chris.
Between kisses, Chris said, “If we keep doing this, I won't want to go to work.”
“But on the contrary, you must.”
“And why is that?”
“Because, you make the big bucks.”
“Is that all I'm good for?” Chris responded, sweetly.
“That among other things.” Sandy replied, pushing Chris out the front door, coffee and paper in hand, only stopping to kiss him again before shutting the door.
Now, a couple of hours later in the day, Sandy had ditched her cup of coffee for an iced water, and was laying out by the pool. No way was she going to waste her day cleaning the house. And reasonably, the house wasn't that much of a mess. Maybe the bathrooms needed cleaning or the dishes needed done, but she'd make the girls do that when they came home from the therapist. Those were regular chores the girl's needed to do anyway. Especially Emma.
Maybe Sandy would make Emma do both the bathrooms and the dishes as punishment for her bad grades, and then tell Abigail she didn't have to do anything as a reward for her amazing grades. No, Sandy thought to herself. That would cause an argument from Emma. She'd say I was playing favorites.
What a pain, Emma was sometimes. Sure, it was one thing to argue with your siblings and parents on occasion, but it was an entire different thing to turn hostile on them. Sandy and Chris couldn't even reward Abigail for her magnificent behavior and amazing grades, for fear that if they didn't show Emma the same attitude as they showed Abigail, things would get ugly. But all Emma had to do was act a tiny bit more like her sister. Not arguing with everything Sandy and Chris said. Not opposing the authoritative figure at school. Not flunking out of classes. Not trying to sneak out. Not getting bad grades. The list was an endless black hole.
“Mom! We're home!” Interrupting her thoughts, Sandy heard Abigail yell from the front door. She then heard some clanking and smacking, then thudding all the way up the stairs, and finally a slam of the door.
Pretending not to notice the entrance Emma made, Sandy replied, “I'm out back!”
Several minutes passed before Sandy heard flip flops step lightly on the patio and then a figure appear beside her. Dressed in her sailor blue and white bikini swimsuit, Abigail looked extremely annoyed. It wasn't normally that Abigail presented herself as annoyed, so Sandy new right away that something was wrong.
“What's wrong?” Sandy asked.
“Don't pretend you didn't hear that,” Abigail challenged. “She's a mess. That stupid, know-it-all Philologist, didn't do crap for her. It only pissed her off even more. Obviously, whatever she's going through is not something that someone else is going to fix for her.”
“You don't know that. For all we know, she could be suffering inside, and we're not trying hard enough to make her at peace,” Sandy said.
“At peace? You think she wants to be at peace?”
“Yes, I do,” Sandy replied, simply.
“That girl threw a baseball through my car window today! I have to pay for that now. Will she offer to pay for it? No, she won't. She doesn't care what I think of her! She hates me! Why she hates me? I have no idea, and I'm starting to not care.”
“Okay, Abigail, please calm down. Why did she throw a baseball through your car window?”
“Oh, that's the worst part, she was aiming at me! I ducked in time, and it went straight through the window of my car, instead,” Abigail complained.
“She tried to hit you with a baseball?”
“Yes.”
“But you ducked?”
“Yes.”
“So it, instead, went through the window of your car?”
“Yes.”
“Causing the window to shatter, I presume?”
“Yes.”
“And you reacted by...?”
“I screamed at her for several minutes, but she just stood there and glared at me. Not a word I said made an influence on her, whatsoever. So I made her walk the first three miles home, and then I picked her up and we drove the rest of the way," Abigail stated, like it was no big deal at all.
“You what?”
“I made her walk the last three miles home. It's not like it's that big of deal. It's not raining or thunder storming or anything like that. Just heat, and walking three miles in the heat, isn't going to kill her. Probably do her some good.”
“Okay well did you ask her why she tried to hit you with a baseball?”
“Of course I did. After we got back in the car, I asked her, and she said that 'life would be so much easier if you'd just go away.'” Abigail said, obviously aggravated.
“So she actually tried to harm you?” Sandy was still trying to understand the concept.
“YES mother! She actually tried to harm me! And I'm not going to put up with her doing things like this and not getting a punishment!” Abigail turned around and walked to the edge of the pool, then swan dived in. Resurfacing, she suggested, “You should go talk to her.”
Sandy nodded in agreement, stood up and then walked inside the house, only to hear the music blasting from Emma's room. At this same moment, Chris stepped into the house from the garage door, and frowned at Emma's obtrusive music.
“I'll handle it,” Sandy muttered as she passed Chris on her way up the stairs. This game that Emma liked to play was really starting to get old.
Okay, here's Chapter One... I hope you enjoy it! Remember that I haven't done a single thing of editing yet... so of course there is going to be errors and things that just plainly don't make sense. Let's make the best of it... kay?!
-Alyssa <3
Unexpected
If I die; shall no peace come
I am here for life itself
Why try and tear me down?
I'll only get bak up
Shall life hold no source of purity
We all have evil spirits inside
For maybe if I choose
The path right for me ~
I might feel that chance to finally be happy
Go, go, I tell them quietly
The man of evil prophets shows
Tells me I have a choice to make
I learn today, the day will come
When I come to need to want to
Set you free,
Myself as well <3
- Alyssa Frerking
09 - 30 - 2010
First poem I've ever written. Let me know what you think! Maybe I should pursue writing poems? After-all, you can only improve. (:
I am here for life itself
Why try and tear me down?
I'll only get bak up
Shall life hold no source of purity
We all have evil spirits inside
For maybe if I choose
The path right for me ~
I might feel that chance to finally be happy
Go, go, I tell them quietly
The man of evil prophets shows
Tells me I have a choice to make
I learn today, the day will come
When I come to need to want to
Set you free,
Myself as well <3
- Alyssa Frerking
09 - 30 - 2010
First poem I've ever written. Let me know what you think! Maybe I should pursue writing poems? After-all, you can only improve. (:
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Synopsis Number One
When a drunk driving car accident results in the loss of her mother, step father, and younger sister, Abby is immediately place in the hospital and under strict supervision until her extremely wealthy father, of whom she hasn't spoken to in over six years comes to take her in. As if that isn't bad enough, Abby is diagnosed with Anterograde Amnesia; an illness caused by trauma or damage to the brain. Abby doesn't know who she is, yet we anyone else is. Which means that remembering the car accident, just the previous night before is not an option. The doctors all say there is chance of Abby regaining her memory, but that would take consistent work on her new family's part. If Adam's family isn't willing to take the obligation to help Abby get her memory back, or prevent her from further losing newly learned information, how will he fix things with her once and for all?
Let me know if you're interested! I may or may not just let a sneak peak into my chapter one! (:
~ Alyssa ~
Friday, August 27, 2010
Birthday/High School
Well, today is officially the day I turn fourteen! And it really puts into reality that I'm going to High School this year. Freshman year, baby!
It seemed an illusion. Not yet true until today. Its almost like today really marked the day for me. And boy can I say that I'm excited for High School. Not only will the classes, for once, be truly challenging. But I'm starting over as well. Making new friends and participating in High School events! It's all really amazing for me. As I think it is for many others as well.
AND I CAN'T WAIT.
My excitement showing a little bit now. I think it will all day. Today at 3:00 until 4:00 I'm going to School Orientation. I'll really get a good look at some of the students that will be at my High School. Out of 2500 kids, I'm sure that I'll make friends easily. For I'll have a lot of choices and people to get to know.
Maybe that's really what I'm excited about. I'm not limited to one group of friends. Or one set of people. I can have as many friends as I want. I can know as many people as I want. It's... different. A chance to really express myself to the fullest.
Have I said how excited I am?
My classes, although unusual, are extremely to my liking.
1) Journalism 1
2) Health Education
3) Career Education
4) Spanish 1
5) English 9 Honors
6) Algebra 1
7) Principles of Science
Oddly enough, I don't have to take a History class until 10th grade. This also makes me happy. :)
It seemed an illusion. Not yet true until today. Its almost like today really marked the day for me. And boy can I say that I'm excited for High School. Not only will the classes, for once, be truly challenging. But I'm starting over as well. Making new friends and participating in High School events! It's all really amazing for me. As I think it is for many others as well.
AND I CAN'T WAIT.
My excitement showing a little bit now. I think it will all day. Today at 3:00 until 4:00 I'm going to School Orientation. I'll really get a good look at some of the students that will be at my High School. Out of 2500 kids, I'm sure that I'll make friends easily. For I'll have a lot of choices and people to get to know.
Maybe that's really what I'm excited about. I'm not limited to one group of friends. Or one set of people. I can have as many friends as I want. I can know as many people as I want. It's... different. A chance to really express myself to the fullest.
Have I said how excited I am?
My classes, although unusual, are extremely to my liking.
1) Journalism 1
2) Health Education
3) Career Education
4) Spanish 1
5) English 9 Honors
6) Algebra 1
7) Principles of Science
Oddly enough, I don't have to take a History class until 10th grade. This also makes me happy. :)
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Must Read Book
As you will soon figure out, my favorite author is Nicholas Sparks and all of his work is inspirational to me and always motivates me to continue working on my book. A book I recently read of his is titled, "The Lucky One."
I really do recommend you try (if you haven't already) reading one of his books. Everything you would want in a book is what he writes about. Loss, betrayal, hope, love, lust, etc. Not only is he an accomplished writer, but he really knows how to drag you into the book until you don't want to go! Romance, suspense, mystery, he writes it all.
http://www.nicholassparks.com/index.asp ~Official Website
http://www.nicholassparks.com/LearnMore.asp?BookID=14 ~"The Lucky One"
http://www.nicholassparks.com/LearnMore.asp?BookID=14 ~"The Lucky One"
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
LIFE ~ More than just a word?
I had my dad ask me this question a lot... what is true happiness and how can you achieve it? Although you could think these would be simple questions with the most simple of answers. But they're not. Not even close. I'm never quite sure what causes TRUE happiness, but I'm pretty darn close to knowing how to improve your life, to make it seem as if you ARE living a life full of happiness. It's not fake happiness, of course. It's 100% real, but everyone is unique in their own way, so you can't live by someone else's standards and expect to be happy.
I think it took me a long time to figure that out. Although I'm still very young, I consider myself intelligent, for I've already started to realize how life works, this early in life. Going through such hard things hasn't been easy. I know that I've had it good a lot more than others have, but I've been through things, seen things, and even done things that have consistently proven my intelligence and maturity is much higher than any of those my age. Sometimes I even feel as if I'm not the same age as some of my peers. I've started to think about things that they look at me and say, "Why does it matter?"
It matters because it's life. It matters because it's what people are having to go through day after day, while we sit here naive as ever and don't even realize it. It's like the generation I'm part of is completely oblivious to what's ACTUALLY going on around them.
Who cares if you have money? Who cares who've you've been with? Who freaking cares what you've done with the hot guy next door? I surely don't. I don't care if you've gone to parties and drank yourself to near death or just bad enough to cause you to vomit. I don't care that you've "done things" with the hottest guy in the school. I just don't care about things like that. THEY DON'T MATTER.
Which brings me back to True Happiness. Does it make you happy that you have a lot of money? Does it make you happy that you brag about "what you've done" with all the guys in the school. Does it make you happy that you like to tear people down? Betray them? Burn the bridges around you?
I surely hope that doesn't make you happy. But then again, how do I know? I can't read your mind. I've met some pretty messed up people, and every single one of them seems to enjoy hurting those around them. And frankly, I can't stand it anymore. I can't stand the fact that life is SO short we must enjoy EVERY moment of it, and some people waste their freaking time to tear down others.
GET A LIFE. Please. Don't worry about others. Worry about yourself, your own well-being, your close family and friends, and don't try to ruin someone else just because of envy or jealously. You should know by now that doing things out of spite is not a way to fix things. If you want things to become fixed, you must forgive what others have done to you, and move one with what's REALLY important. People will betray you. People will lie to you. People will go OUT of their way to be rude to you. That's just the way people are. That's just the way HUMANS are. And no human ( that I know of) is perfect. I'm not even perfect. I have many MANY flaws, but I live, day to day, trying to work on myself and fix those problems of mine. I even know several other people that do the same things... and I don't blame them.
Anyway, remember that True Happiness comes from inside the soul. They aren't just words if they don't have meaning. You must be at peace with yourself before you can truly be happy.
I think it took me a long time to figure that out. Although I'm still very young, I consider myself intelligent, for I've already started to realize how life works, this early in life. Going through such hard things hasn't been easy. I know that I've had it good a lot more than others have, but I've been through things, seen things, and even done things that have consistently proven my intelligence and maturity is much higher than any of those my age. Sometimes I even feel as if I'm not the same age as some of my peers. I've started to think about things that they look at me and say, "Why does it matter?"
It matters because it's life. It matters because it's what people are having to go through day after day, while we sit here naive as ever and don't even realize it. It's like the generation I'm part of is completely oblivious to what's ACTUALLY going on around them.
Who cares if you have money? Who cares who've you've been with? Who freaking cares what you've done with the hot guy next door? I surely don't. I don't care if you've gone to parties and drank yourself to near death or just bad enough to cause you to vomit. I don't care that you've "done things" with the hottest guy in the school. I just don't care about things like that. THEY DON'T MATTER.
Which brings me back to True Happiness. Does it make you happy that you have a lot of money? Does it make you happy that you brag about "what you've done" with all the guys in the school. Does it make you happy that you like to tear people down? Betray them? Burn the bridges around you?
I surely hope that doesn't make you happy. But then again, how do I know? I can't read your mind. I've met some pretty messed up people, and every single one of them seems to enjoy hurting those around them. And frankly, I can't stand it anymore. I can't stand the fact that life is SO short we must enjoy EVERY moment of it, and some people waste their freaking time to tear down others.
GET A LIFE. Please. Don't worry about others. Worry about yourself, your own well-being, your close family and friends, and don't try to ruin someone else just because of envy or jealously. You should know by now that doing things out of spite is not a way to fix things. If you want things to become fixed, you must forgive what others have done to you, and move one with what's REALLY important. People will betray you. People will lie to you. People will go OUT of their way to be rude to you. That's just the way people are. That's just the way HUMANS are. And no human ( that I know of) is perfect. I'm not even perfect. I have many MANY flaws, but I live, day to day, trying to work on myself and fix those problems of mine. I even know several other people that do the same things... and I don't blame them.
Anyway, remember that True Happiness comes from inside the soul. They aren't just words if they don't have meaning. You must be at peace with yourself before you can truly be happy.
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